Here’s a bunch of triffids,

Go take a running jump,
This is no joke, I’ve had enough,
I’ve more than just the hump!

You’ve ruined Christmas and New Year,
Now you can take a hike,
You’re history now you piece of shit,
Now get on your fucking bike!

Or if you need something more personal,

And have a bit to spare from your wage;
Then order a Personalised Dear John Poem,
Or any other poem from the menu on this page!

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