Calling out to Mary Portas,

Of Kinky Knickers fame:
Why the hell don’t you call them BritNiks?
A much more appealing name!

We’re sure they will be amazing,
Of the highest quality;
Comfy and pleasant to wear,
And will last for eternity!

But modest ladies of a certain age,
Won’t buy for one simple reason;
They simply don’t yearn to be kinky!
To them it’s so old season!

The average 30-somethings,
May well aspire to the label;
But what about the rest of the ladies,
Like Winifred, Agnes and Mabel?!

Millions more older ladies,
Would buy them but for the name,
Putting off so many customers,
An unnecessary shame!

Using sex to sell knickers,
Is a bit old hat anyway,
It isn’t hip, it isn’t cool,
You need to get more au fait!

It’s not too late to change your mind,
And broaden your marketing scope;
You’ll have to pay us some money;
But your BritNiks will have more hope!

Framed flower blue

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